He Is Not Here Anymore

Five years ago I went to rehab. All of the sudden I was accompanied with unknown people I barely had something together with. At the moment I was shareholder and one of the C level people in my company. We were one of the largest companies in the country dealing with IT and connected services.

People around were 20 percent women, the rest was guys. All sorts of people. One chimney man, one medicine doctor, soldiers, bus drivers, company owners, mathematicians… All sorts of people.

Somehow I get along with a guy. He was sales manager in multinational car producing company in charge for the whole region. Great guy. We had a lot in common, so we started to talk to each other, hanging around together and everything what get with that. He was divorced, with two kids, son of 15 and daughter of 18. Alcohol ruined their marriage. There was no way back. He crossed the thin line after which his wife refused to communicate with him at all.

We started rehab somewhat at the same time suffering together and getting more sober day after day, on easy pace.

I stayed on rehab for a month, he stayed for two or three weeks longer, I am not sure anymore.

He went back to old job, I quit mine and sold my share of company. I had to reset myself and restart my career. Similar job but differently oriented.

We stayed in touch. First two years everything was quite fine. We had occasional coffee (I am drinking solely water and a cup or two of coffee daily, I quite soda drinks, juices and everything that is not water for rehydration).

We had a common “men” chats talking about how business is going, how kids are growing, about the weather, bad jokes. Laughing constantly. We were sober, we had a second chance to rebuild ourselves. We were good at that.

Sometimes we had a lunch or dinner together. My wife talked with him a few times. There were some calls, rare calls, when he just needed someone to speak with as he was living alone.

Last month we had the usual coffee break together at a local cafe. Everything seemed to be regular, normal. He had his problems to talk about, I had mine. We were laughing and talking bad jokes as usual.

Two weeks ago he commited suicide. His brother informed me.

He was sober.

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